Printed in the Jerusalem Post, 13 March, 2009
"Women, stop crying! Calm down! No shouting. Control yourselves. We can't hear the eulogies with you going on like this." This is what the rabbis of Yavne have to say to women at funerals. "Oranit" was at a family funeral recently where women were not only forbidden from approaching the grave, but were forbidden from crying.
"Some religious women of my family repeated what the cemetery woman had said," Oranit recalled. "Some said, 'If it's forbidden, it's forbidden. Let us calm down.' Others said, "We must not harm the sanctity of the dead. Women should not come near the graves. It will damage our wombs."
The religious world is very creative at finding new and unthinkable ways to be cruel to women. This one, like so many others, is entrenched in religious powers that be, justified with a pseudo-religious language that asks women to sacrifice their entire selves for the sake of "the community", or in this case, "the city." According to Oranit, in Yavne, the rabbis have declared that due to a "high rate of deaths of young people in Yavne, we have vowed that women will not approach the grave during the burial - and that would be the Tikkun (healing) of Yavne," and that women are impure "because we menstruate and according to Jewish religion we are prohibited from walking amongst the graves."
When will this horrible absurdity end? How can we fight this?
Read Oranit's article on the Kolech website, in Hebrew or in English
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